Wednesday, October 13, 2010

42 Practical tips for self-development !

*o42 Practical Ways to Improve Yourself*

By Celestine Chua

Are you someone who likes to grow? Do you constantly seek to improve
yourself and become better?

If you do, then we have something in common. I'm very passionate about
personal growth. It was just 4 years ago when I discovered my passion for
growing and helping others grow. At that time, I was 22 and in my final year
of university. As I thought about the meaning of life, I realized there was
nothing more meaningful than to pursue a life of development and betterment.
It is through improving ourselves that we get the most out of life.

After 1.5 years of actively pursuing growth and helping others to grow
through my personal development blog, I realize there is never an end to the
journey of self improvement. The more I grow, the more I realize there is so
much out there I don't know, so much that I have to learn.

For sure, there is always something about ourselves we can improve on. The
human potential is limitless, so it's impossible to reach a point of no
growth. Whenever we think we are good, we can be even better.

As a passionate advocate of growth, I'm continuously looking for ways to
self-improve. I've compiled 42 of my best tips which might be helpful in
your personal growth journey. Some of them are simple steps which you can
engage in immediately. Some are bigger steps which takes conscious effort to
act on. Here they are:

*1. Read a book every day.* Books are concentrated sources of wisdom. The
more books you read, the more wisdom you expose yourself to. What are some
books you can start reading to enrich yourself? Some books I've read and
found useful are Think and Grow Rich, Who Moved My Cheese, 7 Habits, The
Science of Getting Rich and Living the 80/20 Way. I've heard positive
reviews for The Tipping Point, Outliers and The Difference Maker, so I'll be
checking them out soon.

*2. Learn a new language.* As a Singaporean Chinese, my main languages are
English, Mandarin and Hokkien (a Chinese dialect). Out of interest, I took
up language courses in the past few years such as Japanese and Bahasa
Indonesian. I realized learning a language is a whole new skill altogether
and the process of acquainting with a new language and culture is a totally
a mind-opening experience.

*3. Pick up a new hobby.* Beyond just your usual favorite hobbies, is there
something new you can pick up? Any new sport you can learn? Examples are
fencing, golf, rock climbing, football, canoeing, or ice skating. Your new
hobby can also be a recreational hobby. For example, pottery, Italian
cooking, dancing, wine appreciation, web design, etc. Learning something
new requires you to stretch yourself in different aspects, whether
physically, mentally or emotionally.

*4. Take up a new course. *Is there any new course you can join? Courses are
a great way to gain new knowledge and skills. It doesn't have to be a
long-term course – seminars or workshops serve their purpose too. I've been
to a few workshops and they have helped me gain new insights which I had not
considered before.

*5. Create an inspirational room.* Your environment sets the mood and tone
for you. If you are living in an inspirational environment, you are going to
be inspired every day. In the past, I didn't like my room at all because I
thought it was messy and dull. A few years ago, I decided this was the end
of it – I started on a "Mega Room Revamp" project and overhauled my room.
The end result? A room I totally relish being in and inspires me to be at my
peak every day.

*6. Overcome your fears.* All of us have fears. Fear of uncertainty, fear of
public speaking, fear of risk… All our fears keep us in the same position
and prevent us from growing. Recognize that your fears reflect areas where
you can grow. I always think of fears as the compass for growth. If I have a
fear about something, it represents something I've yet to address, and
addressing it helps me to grow.

*7. Level up your skills.* If you have played video games before especially
RPGs, you'll know the concept of leveling up – gaining experience so you can
be better and stronger. As a blogger, I'm constantly leveling up my writing
skills. As a speaker, I'm constantly leveling up my public engagement
abilities. What skills can you level up?

*8. Wake up early.* Waking up early (say, 5-6am) has been acknowledged by
many (Anthony Robbins, Robin Sharma, among other self-help gurus) to improve
your productivity and your quality of life. I feel it's because when you
wake up early, your mindset is already set to continue the momentum and
proactively live out the day. Seth recently wrote a waking up early series
which you should check out to help cultivate this habit.

*9. Have a weekly exercise routine.* A better you starts with being in
better physical shape. I personally make it a point to jog at least 3 times
a week, at least 30 minutes each time. You may want to mix it up with
jogging, gym lessons and swimming for variation.

*10. Start your life handbook.* A life handbook is an idea I started 3 years
ago. Basically, it's a book which contains the essentials on how you can
live your life to the fullest, such as your purpose, your values and goals.
Sort of like your manual for your life. I started my life handbook since
2007 and it's been a crucial enabler in my progress.

*11. Write a letter to your future self.* What do you see yourself as 5
years from now? Will you be the same? Different? What kind of person will
you be? Write a letter to your future self – 1 year from now will be a good
start – and seal it. Make a date in your calendar to open it 1 year from
now. Then start working to become the person you want to open that letter.

*12. Get out of your comfort zone.* Real growth comes with hard work and
sweat. Being too comfortable doesn't help us grow – it makes us stagnate.
What is your comfort zone? Do you stay in most of the time? Do you keep to
your own space when out with other people? Shake your routine up. Do
something different. By exposing yourself to a new context, you're literally
growing as you learn to act in new circumstances.

*13. Put someone up to a challenge.* Competition is one of the best ways to
grow. Set a challenge (weight loss, exercise, financial challenge, etc) and
compete with an interested friend to see who achieves the target first.
Through the process, both of you will gain more than if you were to set off
on the target alone.

*14. Identify your blind spots.* Scientifically, blind spots refer to areas
our eyes are not capable of seeing. In personal development terms, blind
spots are things about ourselves we are unaware of. Discovering our blind
spots help us discover our areas of improvement. One exercise I use to
discover my blind spots is to identify all the things/events/people that
trigger me in a day – trigger meaning making me feel annoyed/weird/affected.
These represent my blind spots. It's always fun to do the exercise because I
discover new things about myself, even if I may already think I know my own
blind spots (but then they wouldn't be blind spots would they?). After that,
I work on steps to address them.

*15. Ask for feedback.* As much as we try to improve, we will always have
blind spots. Asking for feedback gives us an additional perspective. Some
people to approach will be friends, family, colleagues, boss, or even
acquaintances, since they will have no preset bias and can give their
feedback objectively.

*16. Stay focused with to-do lists.* I start my day with a list of tasks I
want to complete and this helps make me stay focused. In comparison, the
days when I don't do this end up being extremely unproductive. For example,
part of my to-do list for today is to write a guest post at LifeHack.Org,
and this is why I'm writing this now! Since my work requires me to use my
computer all the time, I use Free Sticky Notes to manage my to-do lists.
It's really simple to use and it's a freeware, so I recommend you check it

*17. Set Big Hairy Audacious Goals (BHAGs).* I'm a big fan of setting BHAGs.
BHAGs stretch you beyond your normal capacity since they are big and
audacious – you wouldn't think of attempting them normally. What are BHAGs
you can embark on, which you'll feel absolutely on top of the world once you
complete them? Set them and start working on them.

*18. Acknowledge your flaws.* Everyone has flaws. What's most important is
to understand them, acknowledge them, and address them. What do you think
are your flaws? What are the flaws you can work on now? How do you want to
address them?

*19. Get into action.* The best way to learn and improve is to take action.
What is something you have been meaning to do? How can you take action on it
immediately? Waiting doesn't get anything done. Taking action gives you
immediate results to learn from.

*20. Learn from people who inspire you.* Think about people you admire.
People who inspire you. These people reflect certain qualities you want to
have for yourself too. What are the qualities in them you want to have for
yourself? How can you acquire these qualities?

*21. Quit a bad habit.* Are there any bad habits you can lose? Oversleeping?
Not exercising? Being late? Slouching? Nail biting? Smoking? Here's some
help on how you can quit a bad habit.

*22. Cultivate a new habit.* Some good new habits to cultivate include
reading books (#1), waking up early (#8), exercising (#9), reading a new
personal development article a day (#40) and meditating. Is there any other
new habit you can cultivate to improve yourself?

*23. Avoid negative people.* As Jim Rohn says, "You are the average of the 5
people you spend the most time with". Wherever we go, there are bound to be
negative people. Don't spend too much of your time around them if you feel
they drag you down.

*24. Learn to deal with difficult people.* There are times when there are
difficult people you can't avoid, such as at your workplace, or when the
person is part of your inner circle of contacts. Learn how to deal with
them. These people management skills will go a long way in working with
people in the future.

*25. Learn from your friends.* Everyone has amazing qualities in them. It's
up to how we want to tap into them. With all the friends who surround you,
they are going to have things you can learn from. Try thinking of a good
friend right now. Think about just one quality they have which you want to
adopt. How can you learn from them and adopt this skill for yourself? Speak
to them if you need to – for sure, they will be more than happy to help!

*26. Start a journal.* Journaling is a great way to gain better
self-awareness. It's a self-reflection process. As you write, clarify your
thought process and read what you wrote from a third person's perspective,
you gain more insights about yourself. Your journal can be private or an
online blog. I use my personal development blog as a personal journal too
and I've learned a lot about myself through the past year of blogging.

*27. Start a blog about personal development.* To help others grow, you need
to first be walking the talk. There are expectations of you, both from
yourself and from others, which you have to uphold. I run The Personal
Excellence Blog, where I share my personal journey and insights on how to
live a better life. Readers look toward my articles to improve themselves,
which enforces to me that I need to keep improving, for myself and for the
people I'm reaching out to.

*28. Get a mentor or coach.* There's no faster way to improve than to have
someone work with you on your goals. Many of my clients approach me to coach
them in their goals and they achieve significantly more results than if they
had worked alone.

*29. Reduce the time you spend on chat programs.* I realized having chat
programs open at default result in a lot of wasted time. This time can be
much better spent on other activities. The days when I don't get on chat, I
get a lot more done. I usually disable the auto start-up option in the chat
programs and launch them when I do want to chat and really have the time for

*30. Learn chess (or any strategy game).* I found chess is a terrific game
to learn strategy and hone your brainpower. Not only do you have fun, you
also get to exercise your analytical skills. You can also learn strategy
from other board games or computer games, such as Othello, Chinese Chess,
WarCraft, and so on.

*31. Stop watching TV.* I've not been watching TV for pretty much 4 years
and it's been a very liberating experience. I realized most of the programs
and advertisements on mainstream TV are usually of a lower consciousness and
not very empowering. In return, the time I've freed up from not watching TV
is now constructively used for other purposes, such as connecting with close
friends, doing work I enjoy, exercising, etc.

*32. Start a 30-day challenge.* Set a goal and give yourself 30 days to
achieve this. Your goal can be to stick with a new habit or something you've
always wanted to do but have not. 30 days is just enough time to strategize,
plan, get into action, review and nail the goal.

*33. Meditate.* Meditation helps to calm you and be more conscious. I also
realized that during the nights when I meditate (before I sleep), I need
lesser sleep. The clutter clearing process is very liberating.

*34. Join Toastmasters (Learn public speaking).* Interestingly, public
speaking is the #1 fear in the world, with #2 being death. After I started
public speaking as a personal development speaker/trainer, I've learned a
lot about how to communicate better, present myself and engage people.
Toastmasters is an international organization that trains people in public
speaking. Check out the Toastmaster clubs nearest to you here.

*35. Befriend top people in their fields.* These people have achieved their
results because they have the right attitudes, skill sets and know-how. How
better to learn than from the people who have been there and done that? Gain
new insights from them on how you can improve and achieve the same results
for yourself.

*36. Let go of the past.* Is there any grievance or unhappiness from the
past which you have been holding on? If so, it's time to let it go. Holding
on to them prevents you from moving on and becoming a better person. Break
away from the past, forgive yourself, and move on. Just recently, I finally
moved on from a past heartbreak of 5 years ago. The effect was liberating
and very empowering, and I have never been happier.

*37. Start a business venture.* Is there anything you have an interest in?
Why not turn it into a venture and make money while learning at the same
time? Starting a new venture requires you to be learn business management
skills, develop business acumen and have a competitive edge. The process of
starting and developing my personal development business has equipped me
with many skills, such as self-discipline, leadership, organization and

*38. Show kindness to people around you.* You can never be too kind to
someone. In fact, most of us don't show enough kindness to people around us.
Being kind helps us to cultivate other qualities such as compassion,
patience, and love. As you get back to your day after reading this article
later on, start exuding more kindness to the people around you, and see how
they react. Not only that, notice how you feel as you behave kindly to
others. Chances are, you will feel even better than yourself.

*39. Reach out to the people who hate you.* If you ever stand for something,
you are going to get haters. It's easy to hate the people who hate us. It's
much more challenging to love them back. Being able to forgive, let go and
show love to these people requires magnanimity and an open heart. Is there
anyone who dislikes or hates you in your life? If so, reach out to them.
Show them love. Seek a resolution and get closure on past grievances. Even
if they refuses to reciprocate, love them all the same. It's much more
liberating than to hate them back.

*40. Take a break.* Have you been working too hard? Self-improvement is also
about recognizing our need to take a break to walk the longer mile ahead.
You can't be driving a car if it has no petrol. Take some time off for
yourself every week. Relax, rejuvenate and charge yourself up for what's up

*41. Read at least 1 personal development article a day.* Some of my readers
make it a point to read at least one personal development article every day,
which I think is a great habit. There are many terrific personal development
blogs out there, some of which you can check here.

*42. Commit to your personal growth.* I can be writing list articles with 10
ways, 25 ways, 42 ways or even 1,000 ways to improve yourself, but if you've
no intention to commit to your personal growth, it doesn't matter what I
write. Nothing is going to get through. We are responsible for our personal
growth – not anyone else. Not your mom, your dad, your friend, me or
LifeHack. Make the decision to commit to your personal growth and embrace
yourself to a life-long journey of growth and change. Kick off your growth
by picking a few of the steps above and working on them. The results may not
be immediate, but I promise you that as long as you keep to it, you'll start
seeing positive changes in yourself and your life.

Edited by Lawyer Asad

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